2014 NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS!
Published January 10, 2014
This year instead of making resolutions I don’t keep I am going to make some for everyone else.
1. No gum chewing.
2. When you are in your car at a red light, you will pay attention. The minute the light changes to green, you will go. No sitting there in outer space. If you pay attention, maybe I will be able to get thru the light too.
3. When changing freeways (for example, exiting 59 to enter 610) you will not break in line. You will not hang out at the cutoff point, and squeeze in making the rest of us wait even longer to exit.
4. You will not pretend that you don’t realize I am trying to change lanes. You will not act like you don’t see me. You will smile and either speed up or slow down so I can join your lane.
5. You will not sneeze around others. And you won’t expect anyone to shake your germy hand. Don’t stick your hand out making for an awkward situation when we want to avoid your germs. Why is the medical profession still doing this when they know hands spread germs?
6. You will disconnect your annoying car alarm. They don’t do any good and hurt our ears.
7. You will never write a check in the checkout line. And we don’t need to wait while you record the check in your check register. Have some consideration for others please.
8. And while you are in the checkout line, we don’t want to hear your conversation on your cell phone. You are not that important that it can’t wait.
9. More checkout resolutions include taking too much time signing the credit card pad with the electronic pen. Why are you spending so much time carefully writing your name and making us wait? You never see that signature. Just put a check mark and move out of the way.
10. When you are on an airplane, you will never recline your seat. Get a backbone and sit up straight. Your posture needs it.
11. You will not move to Texas. We aren’t really that friendly.
12. If you are a developer, you won’t build anymore high rises in Houston. We can barely get around now for all the traffic. And while I am at it, why didn’t you leave any green space around those high rises? Oh no, you had to build right on the street.
13. Restaurant owners you need to do something about the noise. Are you wanting us to hurry up and leave because we cannot hear each other? Cement floors are fine but what about carpet to absorb some of the sound?
14. And while I am at it, restaurant owners your unnecessary valet parking is dumb. Why do I need to valet, if there is an available parking lot? Valet parking for no reason is stupid. Even worse, the valet guys are hogging the best spaces.
Making this list has made me feel much better. Now it is up to you to keep these 2014 resolutions. You will be a better person for it.